My Partner Does Not Want To Work: How Can I Motivate Him?

Certain frustrations and work situations can negatively influence the life of the person who suffers them, but also their family. It is then that some conflicts usually appear, such as the one caused when money is needed, but the couple does not want to work.

Difficult times often bring to light both the qualities and the shortcomings of those around you. It is essential to try to find a solution to this situation in the fastest and most positive way possible.

We recommend some guidelines to keep in mind in the following article.

How to act if my partner does not want to work?

If your partner does not want to work under any circumstances, it is important that you talk to her and explain the situation to her. Sometimes it is even necessary to go to a psychologist, especially if the refusal is due to past trauma.

You should also take into account the following keys:

1. Be patient

Having your partner at home all the time, without trying to look for a job,  can become an irritating fact. However, you have to stay calm and avoid arguments. In many cases, it is not a choice and your self-esteem is damaged.

You need to give him time so that he can regain his energy, while still being attentive to his reactions. It is typical for the partner who does not want to work to be in a bad mood or nervous. In reality, this may be due to the frustration of feeling a nuisance.

2. Identify the true cause

Although it is difficult, problems must be dealt with as a couple, and talking is the only way to find the solution. You have to find out what is the reason why that person does not want to work.

Sometimes the difficulty in finding a job is due to age, lack of qualifications, or even depression. It is important to establish what is happening and, as already mentioned, ask for outside help.

It can also happen that you are in a state of real comfort and do not intend to step out of your comfort zone. In these cases, it is important that you be blunt and let him know how irresponsible his behavior is.

3. Reassign household chores

If you don’t want to work, shutting yourself up at home doing nothing is not the solution either. It is important that since you do not work outside, you work inside. Establish with him or her a series of tasks that you will share between the two of you.

This will keep your mind busy and feel like you are taking productive action. It may also help you assess how difficult it is to keep your house in order.

4. Encourage and strengthen their virtues

The best way to motivate a person to work is to strengthen their skills with praise and affection. You can help him put together a personalized resume and encourage him to search without pushing.

It is a good opportunity to show that not everything is impossible, but it is not easy either. The best advice is to dare to try new jobs and have small goals.

It is worth bearing in mind that, beyond the material aspect, work is an activity that can contribute to a person’s self-esteem and identity. Many describe it as an “uplifting” activity.

5. Talk about the family impact

Little by little, it is important to talk about the consequences that this crisis can have on the family. On the one hand, the expectations for the future regarding the acquisition of a new job. On the other, the need to cut down on some expenses to avoid debt.

The important thing is to make the proposals from a positive perspective, as partial and temporary actions that can be reversed. Visualizing, in practice, the influence of your decision will achieve greater flexibility.

What to do if my partner does not want to work and does not care?

There are people who, directly, have no interest in working. They are very comfortable when they are financially dependent on their partners. They continue their routine, practically assuming the role of children.

If this is the case, you will probably have to consult with a professional and think about whether you want such a person by your side. Of course, do not forget that maturity in couples is an indication of well-being.